“I’m doing online dating. It’s like a full-time job!”
A friend of mine, a 40-something, good-looking, successful man, said this to me as he expressed his frustrations with online dating. Many single men and women that we have worked with over the years have expressed similar sentiments.
Putting yourself out there can be hard work. Not to mention scary as hell. After all, no matter how much vetting you do before the first encounter, there’s no telling if it’ll be fun, or just another wasted evening where you go home by yourself, thinking, “Will I ever find someone?”
On the blessing side, it makes it a lot easier to simply find people to date in your area. And for some singles who feel shy about “getting out there”, online dating has made it more doable to actually get in the game.
On the curse side, however, online dating has exacerbated what has always been a challenge for singles trying to date and create relationships: The tendency to “shop” by form, appearance, and specs. Or, as we like to call it, dating Amazon.com-style. You scroll through profiles much like you do products on Amazon. You check the specs, and you discard a hundred for every one that looks interesting. It’s A LOT of scrolling and swiping! Of course it’s important that you find people you have some attraction; that goes without saying.
But ask yourself ...
"Why do you want to date and have a relationship in the first place?"
Isn't that what we all want in sharing love?
But there's one more factor we have to look at: YOU
Let's be honest: If you’re anything like most singles out there, you are in a painful waiting pattern. You go on a date, waiting to see who shows up. You’re waiting to find a worthy person before you show up. You’re waiting for someone who’ll make you feel wanted before you dare to love. And all the while you’re waiting, you are keeping your love to yourself. YOU don't love all the way.
You're waiting instead of creating
Sharing yourself with other good-hearted people – starting NOW! – is the best medicine to open your heart. Sharing ALL of yourself – beauty, brilliance, and bravery as well as hurts, fears, and weird habits – is the way to make your heart sing and your soul soar.
And we’re talking about sharing yourself with actual, in-the-flesh human beings. Not online chats, emails, or texts. Those are useful for a limited purpose, but totally useless in filling you up and setting your love free.
You gotta set your love free! When your love gets all bottled up in your heart, with no way to be expressed, you get all weird! You fret about the next date, or the lack of next date. You obsess about who’s calling back and who’s not. You feel the stress and fear and tension. You feel less radiant, less vibrant, less juicy, less alive.
Because the expressing, giving, and sharing of your love IS your vibrancy and aliveness! When you don't let yourself love freely, you inadvertently make yourself less attractive!
That’s what Singles in Love is for.
A weekend for you to genuinely connect with others.
A weekend that’s just for you, for your personal and spiritual growth.
A weekend where you open to love and relationship on a very deep level.
A weekend where you get supported and challenged by a master facilitator to weed out what gets in your way, while strenghening what's true and good and beautiful about you.
Some Highlights of What You Will Experience:
Sonika has been running Love's errand for over 40 years. Sonika Tinker, MSW, is a Certified NLP Professional, Certified Mediator, Certified Enneagram Teacher and co-author of The Good Divorce. She has empowered thousands of singles and couples to find and create passionate, intimate, inspiring lives and relationships. She has a unique gift for helping you cut through the craziness of dating and relationships and reconnect you with love, passion, and your Full Potential!